reality shift

This feels like another reality shift, a catapult.  
Contraction and then launching?
I feel change crawling in like fog,
I feel it before it gets here.
what I know and see.
I feel it coming in advance,
and that's hard to understand 
or describe to others.
Big me trusts.  
Little me is weary and frightened of letting go, 
endings, less structure.
I'd like enough stability 
that I didn't often feel like 
I was falling down hills in the dark
and waking up in new unfamiliar places.
The old reality is flickering?  In and out?
It's static, then vivid, and then fading...
yes flickering.
And overlapping new reality?
I can feel both,
like two stations at the same time.
Wonder why I feel grieving...
I expected celebrating and breath of free-ness-
not grieving.  Who is mourning?
So many on the planet are mourning...
It hurts my heart to feel it all.

He says "you have not completely let go.
You're real close.  
Jump time lines with me please?"
Hold hands and jump?
Or fly?

I'm sensing a lot and it's all 
entirely different than ever before.
I'm sensing things I can't see, 
seeing things I can't hear,

 

this book looks intriguing

hearing things that haven't happened yet.
Perhaps I sense I am losing my mind 
and everything else,
and I don't want you to see it too.